View Full Version : Trip report: Mdw 2009


Avon Barksdale
03-03-2010, 10:16 AM
Another Trip Report from the Dallas crew. Names have been changed and the characters will be referred to as:

Guy #1 – David Silver
Guy #2 – Dylan McKay
Guy #3 – Brandon Walsh
Guy #4 – Steve Sanders
Guy #5 – Jim Walsh
Sister #1 – Brenda Walsh
Sister #2 – Valerie Malone
Skankonia – the group collectively know as “friends of Sister #1 or Sister #2”
Lenny the Jet VIP Host as himself

We have 2 hotel rooms thanks to Dylan McKay’s gambling problem. A room at Caesars Palace and at Palazzo.
We roll to Jet Nightclub on Thursday night for:

A. Buy 1 Ciroc (So get another shot of ciroc in ya. Cause I'm gon' be rockin' ya) get a bottle of Sky Vodka free.

B. They feature hip hop and rap not that stuff like house and techno that makes me want to lay under a stream of falling cinder blocks

C. Brandon Walshs two sisters, Brenda Walsh and Valerie Malone were getting a table there with Skankonia so we all thought it would be a good idea to kick it together.

As soon as we get to Jet we run into Lenny who is a host for the nightclub who ironically went to college with David Silver who is in our crew. Immediately we know Lenny has the hook up like Masta P. We get to our table and order our Ciroc and mixers and all that. We meet our waitress, her name was …………cant remember but for the sake of this story it is Rack-a-saurus Rex. Her funbags were official, so official all she needed was a whistle.

Night starts off pretty normal just drinking and hanging out, just arrived in Vegas a few hours earlier so I guess everyone was unwinding for a bit. Lenny (not Wilkens) shows up and drops a round of shots on us and brings up some girls. These girls were (allegedly) dancers for the Dallas Mavericks. All I know is I would have let any of these chics do the Cupid Shuffle on my face after serving a tour in Afghanistan with no shower. Immediately our boy Steve Sanders runs over there. To sum up Steve Sanders um he might be 20 % retarded (he was the guy with the “icebreaker” line from our previous TR). However he will talk to any girl anywhere at any time so he is good to have as your wingman cuz you can send him into any situation and he will go without hesitation,..he is kind of like Chewbaca.

These girls probably think he is a sped but they are kicking it. In the meantime, Brandon Walsh’s sisters and friends show up. To keep thinks simple we will refer to their friends as Skankonia which is latin for a group of skanks, usually 3-4 who suck. See the reason Skankonia is there is because one member gives Mike Miller (NBA player) mustache rides over MDW as her tribute to the nation. I can not figure out why anyone would hump Mike Miller. He is pale, ghetto, and resembles Dracula. Oh wait he made $9,780,937 this year while averaging 10 points, 4, rebounds, 2.5 asissts, and a couple turnovers. (please note that later in the weekend I was able to secure a photo of Mike Miller bonging a beer out of a plastic cock). Pictures will hopefully be added soon.

Anyhow Brenda Walsh, Valerie Malone, and Skakonia get settled in, order their drinks, etc. Meanwhile Jim Walsh has moved in on the dance team. Jim Walsh’s biceps are the size of most people’s thighs. We had to send in the muscle relief because at this point its become obvious to the girls that Lenny is different. Lenny comes back up out of the kitchen with…….more shots. For the most part the night was pretty normal, people are dancing, throwing their diamonds in the sky, drinking, etc. Some of the dancers come and go, some different girls come around.

Its getting pretty late now and everyone is as you would expect---hammered. And as a result of this people start doing some pretty random things. Valerie Malone apparently wasn’t happy with Jim Walsh when he told her that Hot Beef Injection was not on tonight's late night menu and she got pretty pissed. I think she was Loose off the Goose and as she was leaving the table area decided to fling a bottle of vodka in our direction. It got all over us but since I am usually on a “24 hour champagne diet” I was not phased. Its not like her brother Brandon Walsh could have restrained her as he was the drunkest in the group. All of a sudden Lenny was creeping on us and said your boy Brandon Walsh has gotta go. Why is that? Well if you look over Brandon Walsh is pissing on our VIP area. It didn’t matter that you could see the restroom sign 15 feet away, Brandon Walsh had to go. At this point Brandon Walsh needed to “do like Jamie” and blame it on the A-A-A-A-A-Ciroc. Brandon Walsh wound up leaving and then also wound up sneaking back in. He is obviously too elusive for the Jet staff. I think he wound up getting kicked out again at some point. Its pretty late like 3 am or later. Lenny wanted to go to another club after his shift ended. I cant remember who got in his car...I think it was Dylan McKay, David Silver and Skankonia for sure and we wound up going to some club. We got there and Lenny asked if we wanted to throw down on a $400 bottle at 4 am. Hey Lenny, thanks for the ride G…..now scram. At this point we lost Lenny and ran off to that café to put back some breakfast.

To be continued…

DownriversSituation
03-03-2010, 10:38 AM
Sound like a wild trip! M Miller can eat a D*ckup til he hiccups!

NyceGuy
03-03-2010, 11:53 AM
Nice TR. Love the name.

dnix
03-03-2010, 11:57 AM
just curious, but how is this another trip report when this is your first post?????????

nyc2vegas
03-03-2010, 12:04 PM
just curious, but how is this another trip report when this is your first post?????????

if im not mistaken, this is the same person or a person from the same group of the last TR from a dallas resident, ill find the thread

masterdeviance
03-03-2010, 12:06 PM
just curious, but how is this another trip report when this is your first post?????????

I think he's part of mpbear's crew?

nyc2vegas
03-03-2010, 12:07 PM
yep from this one, thats what I got from it too

http://forums.jackcolton.com/showthread.php?t=2970&highlight=dallas

masterdeviance
03-03-2010, 12:18 PM
Nice TR by the way. Obviously you're a dedicated 90210 fan.

kori
03-03-2010, 12:32 PM
great trip report. made me laugh out loud at my desk. where is andrea zuckerman.. she never makes it anywhere..

Avon Barksdale
03-03-2010, 12:39 PM
Correct, same crew as mpbear. One of the guys (not me) is a good writer and the rest of us just help him out. We all hate work and have nothing better to do than email back and forth about Vegas trips.

You're right Kori we should've tried to incorporate Kelly Taylor and Andrea Zuckerman, but it was easier to just use Skankonia.

Thanks for the comments.

mpbear14
03-03-2010, 01:28 PM
Yeah, he would definitely be a member of our Vegas contingent. I had no part in this trip report though. It may top the last one, once completed.

Universal
03-03-2010, 01:33 PM
Solid trip report.

As a side note, I consider The Wire to be the best show in television history. Love the Avon Barksdale reference.

kori
03-03-2010, 01:39 PM
As a side note, I consider The Wire to be the best show in television history. Love the Avon Barksdale reference.

Yup. Best. show. ever. That's the main reason I clicked on the thread in the first place.. there's also a mcnulty on here. we need an omar.

Avon Barksdale
03-03-2010, 01:41 PM
Universal - are those girls topless in your pic? Awesome.

I just got into The Wire - just finished Season 1 and I'm hooked. From what I've heard it only gets better.

masterdeviance
03-03-2010, 01:51 PM
Universal - are those girls topless in your pic? Awesome.

I just got into The Wire - just finished Season 1 and I'm hooked. From what I've heard it only gets better.

+2 on The Wire. From what I remember, season 2 was kind of a downer. Very good, but also the most depressing. Mainly about the urban working class and how screwed they are now. The season (4 I think)that focused on the school kids was my personal fav.

Universal
03-03-2010, 02:10 PM
Universal - are those girls topless in your pic? Awesome.

Hahaha...yep. Bare Pool is heaven on earth for me. Hoping to get back there in May.

IndyColtsGal
03-03-2010, 08:16 PM
OH now I gotta see this..... (please note that later in the weekend I was able to secure a photo of Mike Miller bonging a beer out of a plastic cock). Pictures will hopefully be added soon.

Love your style of writing hilarious TR:p

mrankimonki
03-03-2010, 11:31 PM
nice tr dude. im getting pumped for my trip after reading recent TRs :)

it helped last time too. nothing like reading about vegas before a trip!

NyceGuy
03-04-2010, 06:52 AM
Universal - are those girls topless in your pic? Awesome.

I just got into The Wire - just finished Season 1 and I'm hooked. From what I've heard it only gets better.

+2 on The Wire. From what I remember, season 2 was kind of a downer. Very good, but also the most depressing. Mainly about the urban working class and how screwed they are now. The season (4 I think)that focused on the school kids was my personal fav.

Looking back at the whole series, I actually enjoyed season 2 more than I realized. At the time i was bummed because it was so different than season 1, but it's all relevant.

Cortina
03-04-2010, 09:18 AM
Season 2 is so sad. It's about people doing terrible, soul-corrupting things out of a basically noble impulse to save their way of life. It was tough for me to get into because I wanted to go back and see what was happening with the Barksdales, but after about five episodes it had totally gotten my attention.